"Friends come and go, that is the way of things"

This evening while browsing Facebook a photo popped up featuring an old school friend of mine, and his birthday drinks. I knew all but two of his friends, because I had been to school with them - and yet how many do I speak to now? None of them.

There are 12 people in that photo I used to see on a daily basis.

I often wonder how harsh I have been with the bi monthly ritual of purging people from my Facebook friend list. I tell myself "I'm never going to see them again". And it's true - chances are I will never see them. Since mum rented the family home out in Doncaster, that is no longer a base for me to return to. I don't know anybody in York and I have never lived there for a period longer than three weeks so that isn't really a home for me either.

When I look at the photograph taken on my first university birthday, out of the 18 people that are in my group photo I now only see three or 4 of them regularly.

In some ways it makes me quite sad that I haven't held on to as many friendships. People drifted away from me, I never made the effort to speak to them or I never went out as much as them. I am still very content to amuse myself a lot of the time if I'm honest.

Each month I meet new people. Every time I visit London I meet new people, and yet there are so many I don't see any more. I often wonder this time next year how many friends from university I will still keep in touch with, and how many I will banish off my Facebook forever. I simply never saw the point in keeping everyone you ever knew on there for sentimental value even if you never talk to each other.

Maybe I should make more of an effort with people, but then I have never been one of those who texts people out of the blue to chat to them, or messages them on Facebook unless I need to. This has to change I think!

My brush with Japanese state television

WOW. That's all I really can say about today. I'm tired and drained but my god did I have the best day of my life so far.

It's still not sunk in that I'm going to feature in a programme broadcast to a country with a population of 120,000,000 people.

This morning I was tired and grouchy. I was also incredibly nervous - it's not every day something like this happens. So the crew arrived, with a mass of equipment. HD cameras, light panels, highly sensitive microphones and the like. As a journalism student I was a bit awed by the value of items now in my house.

Eventually they set up and began filming various shots of my gramophone, the record itself - and an interview with me. I don't think I was quite prepared for some of the questions they asked me!


After that, I went into uni then they came to film me around the university, and me at work - complete with Jonathan Creswell and Charlotte Reid as my friends walking around and laughing about various things.

Seeing the pros at work was a great thing - they were incredibly detailed and got some really amazing shots out of an otherwise boring gramophone and myself. I even got an origami handkerchief as a thank you - I just can't wait for the tape of the documentary in May!

PS - Given the amount of media appearances I've had lately, I think I could get used to it. It's damn good fun being in front of the camera!

It's times like these I remember why I chose my course...

Today was a very emotionally draining one. I got up at 5:30, and at 7am was on a train to Grantham to carry on my coverage about the "Keep Safe" project.

Basically it's a scheme whereby stickers are put in shop windows for people with learning difficulties recognise a place to go if they experience any trouble or are victims of crime.

It had got to about 2pm, I hadn't eaten since my breakfast at 6am and I was tired already - but I was finishing up. I decided to interview one of the representatives of the project from Hertfordshire where the project has been tested. This lady has learning difficulties, but gave some excellent responses to my questioning.

My heart began to tear when she said quite plainly "People think of us as children, people with learning difficulties". I bit my lip and continued the interview. The lady continued to relate about how she had been assaulted in more ways than one by her family members , neighbours and had abuse thrown at her by people in the street all because of her learning difficulty.

I was so disgusted. She genuinely was one of the nicest people I've met, I got on so well with her and she was so upfront with her responses. The smile never left her face and she really seemed interested in what I had to say.

There is however a silver lining to her tale. She was awarded the MBE for her services to disabled charities, and she told me quite a few funny stories about the times she visited Buckingham Palace for various receptions!

I left the day feeling quite torn inside. Part of my degree is finding people like this to interview, and as I always say - everyone has a story to tell. Unfortunately those stories aren't always the best, and I really can't help but feel for the pain that some of the people I speak to have been through.

I just hope I can do her story justice with my radio package, after hearing her tale I feel compelled to.

Looking to the future with a few less commitments!

Photo: h.koppdelaney

I've been doing a lot of thinking recently about what I'd like to do with my final year at university. Looking at the calendar, it's a trifle depressing that I am past the half way part of my degree - I only now seem to have adjusted to university life!

One of the harder choices I've had to make is whether to re run for the SU again. This has been an especially difficult choice given how much I have enjoyed myself this year. I can honestly say that being a part of the organisation has been one of the best things to happen to me whilst at university, and I will miss it when I go.

It's little things like being in the know, walking in the office and saying hello to Amanda, having people approach you and helping them out - all of them are things that I love and I will miss it next year.

So why do it? Why leave something I love? If I could stick an extra 5 hours in to every day I would have re-run for elections but I simply don't have the time. I am burdened enough as it is this year, and I'd prefer a year of being a proper student journalist rather than a half assed student journalist with too many other commitments.

I think I will give up writing for Bullet magazine, and instead try out something different - newspaper writing for The Linc. I fancy something a bit serious and gritty. Don't get me wrong - feature writing is fun but I'd rather try out my hands on something else whilst I'm here.

Of course, you can't keep me away from getting involved with stuff. I imagine I'll still have some role to play with the LGBT, I will still attend student council and help the union in any way I can - it's the least I can do for them after all the help and development it's given me.

Crossing another hurdle

Here is a photo of a hurdle, because this seemed appropriate...
Photo: studiocurve

Last night I did something I have never, ever done in my life before. I approached that guy in the bar I couldn't take my eyes off all night.

You know what? It failed misterably. In fact, it failed so much I ended up getting more attention from his female friend. I'm sure he found me weird in the end. Not the result I was aiming for.

Still, I woke up this morning feeling very happy with myself. Whenever I go out, I am cripplingly shy. It's annoying to be honest. I've lost count of the number of times I saw a lovely chap on the dancefloor, but was too shy to do anything about it.

So this morning rather than feeling the usual bad feeling that comes after a night, I woke up a lot happier because I did something I had never done before.

And these things get better with practice right?

"If I can't call you my own, I'd rather be all alone / than be with somebody else"

I can thank Paul Whiteman and His Orchestra for that lyric.

Moving swiftly on...

Has it already been 5 days since I last blogged? Time flies by when you're er...not blogging.


Photo: Tony Verdu Carbo (TonyVC on Flikr)


I've recently been giving a great deal of thought to how I spend my personal life. For whatever reason, I find myself sat in the house most nights feeling lonely. The life of a student is such that the hours are so irregular - and when I am at home, it's usually just to eat or sleep.

However, it's when I am home for the weekend and Jamie has his boyfriend over that I am reminded again how bad the romantic side of my life has been since I've come to university. I have yet to meet someone who I clicked with instantly.

-DISCLAIMER- This blog will not turn in to one of these "Woe is me, I'm all alone (and quite possibly desperate) blogs, because I'm not like that.



Photo: QueenSunshine

A good man in my mind must be:

-Clever
-Cute
-Intelligent
-Well read
-Humoured
-Kind
....and above all - not sexually promiscuous!

The problem is with this is that I honestly don't believe that Lincoln has this. The culture I know seems very...superficial. People I know who are in relationships cheat, flirt with others - and those who aren't get around quite a bit.

Of course, it would be rude and ignorant of me to make such sweeping generalisations, and in the interest of fairness I know a few people who aren't like that at all!

Herein lies the problem. A few weekends ago, I went to Leeds to celebrate the lovely Chris Cook's birthday shindig. I met the most lovely man. Let's call him "Dave". I had never met anyone like him before. We sparked like that (and I do recall after 30 minutes discussing Burmese politics!)

I left Leeds feeling more alive then I'd been in a while - however also very upset. Dave's job sees him travel all over the country, and as much as I would like to get to know him better, in reality given our workloads and distance this isn't possible.
I do however feel confident we will remain good friends - it would be criminal not to be.

It looks like it's back to the proverbial drawing board for me. After all, if people tell me I'm a nice guy - then it must be worth waiting for, right?


Photo: James Holden