I have been spurred to write this blog post tonight after hearing of the sad death of a friend, Peter Stapleton.
It was perhaps one of the more unusual and brief friendships I have had. Peter was a regular caller to BBC Radio Lincolnshire, where I started my radio career playing a few songs on the Howard Leader show. Given that it was a Sunday afternoon, I had time to chat to the regular callers, and I spoke to Peter every week.
He would often talk about his close friendship with jazz trumpeter Nat Gonella, and I would enjoy asking him questions about Nat and the adventures they got up to together.
Eventually university came to an end, and there was no prospect of paid work at Radio Lincolnshire, so I moved back home to York. I agreed to keep Peter's number so we could keep on communicating. Peter was extremely eager to share details about his experiences of music in the 1930s and 40s, having lived through them first hand - and I was only too keen to hear as much as possible.
Looking back, I dearly regret not being able to meet him - but Mablethorpe and Lincoln may as well have been at the other end of the world given how poor public transport is in Lincolnshire.
Often when I rang, I would get tantalising details of what he got up to during the war. I understand he was part of the tanks who went to Normandy on D-Day, and liberated the Hague whilst there! He was a very proud man, but as soon as we came to talk about that, he would quickly make his apologies and say goodbye. I get the sense they were painful memories for him.
And so I left Radio York, and onwards to Radio Bristol - and we still kept in touch. I rang once a month or so, and he even sent me memorabilia relating to the jazz age: photos of Nat Gonella, Ivy Benson's All Girl Band. They are all contained in a folder in my drawer, along with the only photo I have of him.
So here I am, mourning the loss of a man who I never met, but one who dearly valued the phone conversations we had. What started out as "just another regular caller" turned into one I really enjoyed hearing from, and I will miss his reminiscences. Despite his poor health in recent months, I know the jazz music kept him happy, and I know he talked about me and my career a lot to his friends. He wanted me to go far in life.
I've even been offered his entire 78rpm record collection, and I don't know what to say to his widow. Peter expressly said that myself and another friend should have his collection when he died, but there just isn't space in my house - yet I feel I should do his last wishes justice in some way.
Peter Stapleton - rest in peace. Though we never met, I'm happy I was able to bring some cheer into your final years, and I'm thankful for the reminiscences shared.
"With cut beard! 2009"
